


I feel like i'm Drowning.

by Faybrinator



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hanahaki Disease, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, Jealous Simon, Lovesickness, M/M, Minor Markus/North (Detroit: Become Human), My First Fanfic, Pining, Pining Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Post-Battle for Detroit (Detroit: Become Human), Slow Burn, hanahaki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-07-11 20:25:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15979853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faybrinator/pseuds/Faybrinator
Summary: Simon always thought markus was special. After he found out that Markus and North were dating he felt an emptyness he'd never felt before and he hated it but he never mentioned how much it hurt him. He didn't want to loose markusAnd then he coughed and everything changed for the worst.





	1. Chapter 1

Simon stared at the ceiling of his apartment. Not being made to need sleep didn't help his situation any, he wished he could power down for awhile and not have to think about Markus. Markus, the man that consumed his thoughts at all times of the day, his smile, his laugh, his voice, all to much for Simon on nights like this.

They won the revolution around a year ago. Without Markus they would of failed. Markus was responsible for his freedom, his hope, his happiness. His everything

Simon fell into rest mode.

 

When Simon woke up he realized he realized that Josh had been calling him he sat up and looked at the time. The clock read Twelve-Thirty. "shit" Simon mumbled as he stumbled out of bed, he should of woke up at Seven-Twenty by himself, he had no explanation as for why he didn't. He got dressed and sent Josh a message telling him he "Overslept" and left. He got to work quickly, though he missed a very important meeting with the president of detroit everything seemed to be fine, Markus noticed his absence but was too busy with North to care. they were always so affection it at work and it drived Simon up the wall, the way they kissed and held hands between meetings. The twos lunch breaks even though neither of them had to eat. It made Simon feel empty, like his thirium pump got tore out of his chest with every affectionate gaze they shared. Simon left early that day.

When Simon got home he felt sick. like he could through up though that was literally impossible, he collapsed on the couch in the living room and fell into a coughing fit. Thirium was everywhere, Simon was scared. he didn't know what was happening, why it was happening. When it finally stopped he looked at the thirum that drenched his hands and the couch below him. tiny white chrysanthemum petals among the blood that dripped from his mouth, he shook. He did not understand why this was happening to him, he was sure he didn't swallow any flowers, how did they get into his system. He did what any reasonable "person" would do any google it.

"I'm coughing up flowers" he typed into the search bar. he got the results he needed, but not what he wanted.

_**Hanahaki Disease**  is a disease in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from [one-sided love](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Pining). It ends when the beloved returns their feelings (romantic love only; strong friendship is not enough), or when the victim dies. It can be cured through surgical removal, but when the infection is removed, the victim's romantic feelings for their love also disappear._

_Simon shook as he read over the text over and over again._ _This Could ~~~~Not Be Happening Right now It had to be some type of crazy dream_. Simon knew it wasn't. He couldn't tell anyone about this, Not Josh, Not North, And especially not Markus. He'd rather die than tell markus. ruin what was left of the friendship he had with him, Markus had slowly drifted away from Simon, in favor of spending time with north. It made Simon sick to his stomach when he thought about it, all the years of them caring for eachother to just be thrown to the side in favor of another android. He wanted to hate North, Hate her for taking Markus away from him, but he couldn't; It was markus' Decision to spend more time with her and less with him. So he stayed silent.

 


	2. It gets worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise these will get longer!

It had been a week since Simon had contracted the disease. It wasn't easy to hide but he got by, he was skipping meetings that weren't mandatory for him to attend. doing more work alone than together with the group. Josh was the only one that ever seemed to notice, Markus and north were always to busy ogling each other to care, not like it would matter much if they did; If anything it would just make it harder to hide.   
They were in the middle of a meeting when simon felt the petals well up in his throat, he excused himself and practically ran to one of the restrooms. once he got into the restroom itself he threw his bag to the ground and bent over the trash bin spewing the white petals everywhere, he hoped nobody noticed him in the hallways. Thirium was in his hair and on his clothes so he tried his best to get it out but he had very little luck with his clothes. the thirium came out of his hair after some work, though now his hair was messed up and all over the place, he desperately tried to get his wet hair back into place as he gave up on his clothes.   
Simon had finally got his disheveled hair back into its previous neat state. But his clothes were still an issue. He grabbed his bag off the ground, pulling his “Detroit University” hoodie out of it and slipping it on over his head, he could see the thirium on near the top of his turtleneck but chose to ignore it. Nobody else would notice it surely wasn’t visible against the dark black even in the well lit room, Simon was sure that Markus and North were so busy shoving their tongues down each others throats they didn’t even notice he was gone.. He had to swallow the petals to keep from throwing up at the thought. They tasted awful really, “Is this what utter despair tastes like?” He thought before leaving the restroom slowly. 

When Simon got back Josh noticed the Thirium instantly.  
“Simon, can I talk to you In private?” Josh asked calmly, gesturing to the door as he stood up and walked out. Simon followed reluctantly. He knew he was about to be questioned about something and that worried him greatly considering what just happened about thirty minutes earlier.   
“Si, why are you covered in thirium?” The taller man questioned, Raising an eyebrow in the process.   
“Really Josh its nothing. I broke a biocomponent earlier in the bathroom but I managed to get it fixed.. I’m fine” Simon smiled, but it wasn’t the kind of smile that reached the eyes, Simon looked sad. Broken. Simon was broken. “I think we better get back to work. I have a-lot I still need to finish” Simon stuttered before hesitently exiting the hallway and going back into the room.   
Josh was rarely if ever violent, Simon knew he wasn’t going to make him tell the truth, though he knew Josh knew that he was lying, but he couldn’t let anybody know about the current predicament he was in right now, Even if it ended up killing him, and it probably would.  
___  
Simon looked at the clock, it was only an hour until he could leave; He could leave early and be done with the hell of seeing North and Markus cuddling in the near empty conference room, Swallowing the petals everytime they kissed. The two were practically making out now. The blonde male wondered if they did it on purpose, it seemed like he was the only one they kissed around. And now this? Maybe they wanted him to die. Swallowing the petals weren’t good for him Simon could tell that much, they were small but came in such amounts it might as well be full blooming flowers at this point, at least then his suffering would end short, But it wasn’t happening anytime soon to his dismay.


End file.
